I’m going to Vegas this weekend.

I don’t know anything about gambling, except that I like to do it and shouldn’t.  I play roulette, because it’s easy to understand.  Roulette isn’t a game of odds.  It’s a game of expectation management.  I like to spread out my bets so I lose slowly — I can bet a bunch on every spin, and there’s almost always money coming back to me (if not quite as much as I put on the table).

Pretty sad, huh?

Last time I was in Vegas, Casey and Lance hung close to the slot machines, which makes sense if you don’t really want to gamble much, just find a place where they will bring you free booze.

I hate slot machines because they are bright and loud and overstimulating and, after a while, you become a reverse ATM, just mindlessly handing out twenties to whatever catches your eye.

But last night I learned that slot machines are always tuned to C-major, which Bob Dylan once referred to as “the key of strength, but also the key of regret.”

Makes sense, when you think about it.  Imagine how awful it would be if they were all dischordant.

-andy